The Student News Site of Bethel University

The Clarion
Bethel University students celebrate the arrival of new students as part of Bethel University’s annual Welcome Week Aug. 23, 2025. In 2025, Bethel brought its largest-ever incoming class of 1,124 students.
Climbing the demographic cliff: Bethel responds to declining enrollment
Bethel University's College of Adult and Professional Studies and Graduate School reside at the Anderson Center, a four-minute drive from Bethel's main campus.
Bethel cuts three CAPS programs as part of larger revamp
Bethel University Associate Professor of Political Science Lynn Uzzell gives a lecture to her American Politics and Government class. Uzzell volunteered to participate in the Grammarly Authorship program in the fall as AI has become harder to detect in academic assignments.
Navigating AI usage in the classroom
Photo gallery: Residence halls compete in Polar Cup
Photo gallery: Residence halls compete in Polar Cup
Students walk in front of Fridley Middle School in Fridley, Minnesota, February 13th, 2025. Fridley Public Schools, along with Duluth Public Schools and the state teachers union, are suing the Trump administration to keep federal immigration agents off school property. In Jan. 2025, the Department of Homeland Security rescinded a DHS policy that designated schools as protected areas to be avoided when conducting immigration enforcement.
“It’s heavy, and it’s high stress:” Bethel graduates grapple with ICE tensions in schools
Bethel University freshman Charlotte Thompson teaches Zumba class April 30, 2026, at the Bethel Wellness Center. Thompson’s passion for dance started in elementary school, and she founded Bethel’s new dance team in the fall of 2025. “It’s so rewarding, but it’s also the most challenging thing I’ve ever done,” she said.
Bethel’s new dance team launches with high hopes for the future
Senior Nicholas Jarman presses play on his stereo in North Village April 24, 2026. Jarman began listening to CDs and cassette tapes on the stereo this semester. “All of this probably ties back to just, I always want to be on my phone less,” Jarman said.
Meet the Bethel students ‘going analog’
Bethel University students sit on the dock over Lake Valentine May 11, 2024.
Is Lake Valentine safe to swim in? It might be deeper than that
The Clarion’s guide to spring finals week
The Clarion’s guide to spring finals week
‘God calls us to be aware:’ How Bethel students can practice political literacy
Bethel University tennis head coach Drew Fernelius addresses the men’s team ahead of its April 25 match against St. John’s University. Fernelius has coached the Royals’ men’s and women’s teams for 14 years, and holds a career winning record for both. “Success drives culture positivity,” Fernelius said. “But love for each other makes it go to a different level.”
The sport of love
Junior forward Emily Erickson shoots a free throw in front of a packed, rainbow-esque crowd during Bethel’s 81-73 victory over Millsaps College in the first round of the NCAA Division III women’s basketball tournament Friday night. Erickson scored a career-high 31 points in the contest, including 22 in the first half. “It was really fun,” Erickson said. “Playing such physical teams all year in the MIAC really prepared us for the postseason because this team was very, very physical.”
Raucous crowd amps up Royals to playoff victory
Players Bethel University's women's basketball team mob each other following the final buzzer of Saturday's MIAC championship. The 62-55 victory marks Bethel's second program championship and first since 2020.
Penner’s Pen: Does winter have the best playoffs?
Rylen Kissell's (Number 3) teammates mob her following her game-tying goal late in the third period of Friday's 2-1 overtime win over Concordia College. With the win and another Saturday, the Royals placed themselves in fifth-place in the MIAC, clinging to a playoff spot with two games to go.
Penner’s Pen: Down to the wire
Bethel guard Blake Schmitz drives to the basket while being pressed by St. Scholastica defender, Hayden Kloos, left, at the Robertson Center in Arden Hills Feb. 7, 2026. Schmitz finished with 26 points and 7 total rebounds in the 85-70 Bethel win.
PHOTO STORY: Royals basketball sweeps Saints
Fake marriages, gender swaps and Shakespearean remakes: The best romance movies
Mikiah Krieg stands on Bethel University's campus with her North Face backpack April 30, 2026.
Four years, two crutches and a tattered backpack
Letter from the editor: Living in the gray
Letter from the editor: Living in the gray
On Apr. 19, 2025, my family and I celebrated the Cambodian New Year alongside hundreds of Cambodians at the Watt Munisotaram. It was the first time I had visited the Buddhist temple for New Year since I was a kid. The celebration involved traditional dances, music and food and clothing booths.
Am I even Asian anymore?
Two All’Antico Vinaio sandwiches in Paris, France, the same sandwich shop in Florence, Italy.
The protein-ification of food
Emily Christiansen and Taylor Hanson talk all things love in episode two of "A Little Bit of Everything."
All things love
Emily Christiansen and Sadie Buteyn record the pilot episode of A Little Bit of Everything with Emily Christiansen.
Another Clarion podcast? It’s Emily’s fault
4 Nations, NBA All Star weekend and “what-ifs”
Super Bowl recap, college hoops preview and trivia games
Ball Knowledge with Cooper Drews
Ball Knowledge with Cooper Drews
Emily Christiansen and Taylor Hanson talk all things love in episode two of "A Little Bit of Everything."
All things love
Emily Christiansen and Sadie Buteyn record the pilot episode of A Little Bit of Everything with Emily Christiansen.
Another Clarion podcast? It’s Emily’s fault
4 Nations, NBA All Star weekend and “what-ifs”
Super Bowl recap, college hoops preview and trivia games
Ball Knowledge with Cooper Drews
Ball Knowledge with Cooper Drews
TFTB: What's the most embarrassing thing you wore in middle school?
TFTB: What’s the most embarrassing thing you wore in middle school?
TFTB: Tell us about your first crush
TFTB: Tell us about your first crush
TFTB: What's something your mom doesn't know about you?
TFTB: What’s something your mom doesn’t know about you?
The Student News Site of Bethel University

The Clarion
The Student News Site of Bethel University

The Clarion
Categories:

Treading Warm Water: SpongeBob

March 26, 2020
Graphic by Braeden Peterson

Zach Walker heads to a pineapple under the sea for this take. 

Donate to The Clarion

Your donation will support the student journalists of Bethel University. Your contribution will allow us to purchase equipment and cover our annual website hosting costs.

More to Discover
More in Podcast
Emily Christiansen and Taylor Hanson talk all things love in episode two of "A Little Bit of Everything."
All things love
Emily Christiansen and Sadie Buteyn record the pilot episode of A Little Bit of Everything with Emily Christiansen.
Another Clarion podcast? It's Emily's fault
4 Nations, NBA All Star weekend and "what-ifs"
Super Bowl recap, college hoops preview and trivia games
Ball Knowledge with Cooper Drews
Ball Knowledge with Cooper Drews
Cooper Drews and Tyler Gustafson!
Cooper Drews and Tyler Gustafson!
Donate to The Clarion